Dr. Faustroll Writes the Wrongs

As I have stated on several occasions, if everyone used his or her right to own and bear arms for the purpose the founding fathers (and their whores) initially intended — to prevent the abuse of police powers by private militias, such as those funded by your tax dollars and various economic stimulus packages — we would all have fewer instances of gun violence because ordinary citizens would not be compelled to simply record instances of police brutality with their camera phones and tie up the court system with doomed attempts to convict cop killers and sadists.

In a just world, they could simply let fly with some protected gospel bird ordnance the Constitution gives us to ensure that killer cops would not get away with murder over and over because of the asinine grand jury system in the NOMF™ that guarantees a cop can kill anyone for any reason and be found “justified.” Oops. Don’t quote me on that.

I myself don’t own firearms because I am building a huge nuclear deterrent to keep me from having to defend myself from the jackbooted community police employed by the prison industrial complex that grew out of the NOMF desire to base an entire culture on fast food and ephemeral services. Don’t quote me on that either.

Part of my DNA comes from that part of American history that is best described by this simple truth: “The only good Indian is a dead Indian.” Later this was revised for reasons I’m not quite clear about to: “Better dead than red,” possibly because the country was becoming increasingly dependent upon people from Bangalore, although some of my research seems to suggest that in the seventies the NOMF started to equated the American Indian Movement (AIM) with communism, which had already been wiped out by greed and stupidity during the Stalin years.

The rest of my DNA comes from an acquaintance of Terri Schiavo, but that was just blind luck. Ask Dellamorte Dellamore, a former roommate of a friend of a friend who once enticed me to snort a line of Draino by calling it white powder, man. It wasn’t that bad.

Seriously, people. You need to stock up on guns and ammunition today before the zombie flu gets really bad and starts infecting the police and National Guard who are already your natural enemies. Imagine creepy deputies responding to your 911 calls and feasting on the brains of you and your family members with absolutely no recourse to the grand jury system to bring them to justice, which is pretty much how the system works today.

With guns and ammunition, at least you can blow their fucking heads off before they bite and save yourself and your loved ones from the pain and humiliation of becoming zombie flu victims, particularly now that several cases have been reported in places as diverse as Kansas City, Los Angeles, Chicago, New York, Detroit, and Memphis.

I know that some liberal al Franqen supporters will question my call to arms in these uncertain economic times, but I beseech my faithful readers to Google for shooting deaths near cemeteries and note how none of the victims in these stories are named, and there are currently no suspects for any of these alleged crimes, although every unnamed body had been shot multiple times above the shoulders, most of them in the head, which is a clear indication that they were victims of the zombie flu.

Where are Rush Hindenberg, Little Oral Annie Coulter, or insignificant Dick Cheney when we need them to lead us through to the light at the end of the zombie flu tunnel.

Surgical masks? That’s not the answer. We need to act rationally with our second amendment rights, and we need to act now before it is too late.

Don’t let the liberals pull the foreskin over your eyes, unless you like it like that.

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