Jan 30 2009
Jimmy Carter predicts Goober Bush rehabilitation by historians
Carter is probably laughing his peanut-picking buttocks off after telling USA Today that he expects the popularity of former First Idiot George “The War President” Bush to improve after “the animosity or the negative ratings” fade into distant memory brought on by the melting of the polar ice caps and the extinction of the human race.
On the one hand, Jimmy Earl was invoking the failed attempts to make Richard Nixon into something other than an obscene parody of the prototypical benevolent dictator at the ugly little end of his meaningless life. On the other, Carter no doubt was suggesting that it is time for sober people to reevaluate the Age of Reagan, which was really little more than shaking the pecker over the third world urinal before zipping up without leaving pee-stains on the trousers of the body politic.
USA Today seems to think that Carter’s own experience of leaving the White House with an approval rating of 34% and going on to win a Nobel Peace Prize and help eliminate Guinea worm disease (which does not, by the way, involve Italian fishermen or Pink Floyd) in some way predicts that a merely mediocre mental defective from Texas will somehow elude capture and trial as a war criminal in The Hague and go on to become the most popular former leader of the NOMPH™ in the history of evolution, which, according to Bush and his buddies is still just a theory, like AIDS is God’s punishment for gays.
That argument ignores that the reason Carter was unpopular at the time is that the NOMPH was still a small cluster of Christian money-changers that arose from Richard Nixon’s silent majority (created by William Safire, a closeted member of the liberal media elite) and inexorably festered into the malignancy that became the Bush administration.
Carter was entirely too moral, too intelligent, and too honest for the country he tried to lead while Reagan’s people worked behind the scenes to ensure he was a one term president. Anyone remember the Iran-Contra affair? Well, if you do, give yourself a pat on the back. Even Flipper Reagan couldn’t remember the details under oath.
Now that Americans have finally begun to understand what they have supported through their proud ignorance and blind faith for the past century or so, Carter’s current approval rating of the job he did in 1976-1980 is roughly equivalent to Biraq Hussein Osama’s approval rating today, 10 days into his term. Imagine that.
The only president to leave office with a lower approval rating than Bush or Carter (who are tied for second place, by the way; give them both a hand!) was Harry Truman, who is now somehow viewed as a great American president despite having authorized the vaporization of two Japanese cities to make the world safe for American capital investment.
My favorite Harry Truman story has to do with the other guy who refused to leave Spirit Lake before Mt. Saint Helens exploded. I suspect that many Americans are thinking of that Harry Truman when they respond to pollsters. Americans are really busy people. They don’t have time to be smart.
