Dr. Faustroll Writes the Wrongs

I’ve never quite understood why the average American idiot feels so threatened whenever someone suggests that the rich should be paying more for the advantages they have by virtue of having no virtue. These idiots have so much nothing, they can only imagine what it would be like to have so much less than someone just like them.

I can hear my mother’s whiny voice: “They think they’re better than us, but they’re not.” And she wasn’t talking about rich people. She was talking about other middle class people who weren’t so into ticky tacky.

And what is this crap about Joe the Plumber? Who has decided that some uncertified tax-delinquent wage-slave who dreams of owning a business he is not currently qualified to purchase is in any way a newsworthy item? Who gave John-Boy McCain and Sarah “Plainly Simpleton” Palin immunity from derision whenever they play the plumber card?

What we have here is not failure to communicate. It is a failure of imagination, a failure of gumption, a failure of all the fail-safe systems the NOMF has put in place to keep the rich safely ensconced behind their wrought-iron gates or in their armored Hummers while the ignorant schmucks who pay the taxes to keep the rich protected in the manner to which they have become accustomed fight over who gets to have the best Halloween costume or Christmas light display.

Wake up, douche bags and douche baguettes of Western civilization. It’s not only turkeys that drown during storms by staring up at the rain with their mouths open saying: “What’s this? What’s this?”

Don’t forget to vote, you nimrods, so you’ll know who the blame for all this damned disorder.

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